Comes Home!
I posted a while back that we lost our old Lab Izzie. She was a piece of work never to be duplicated. Her death was compassionate. It gave me life. So I found myself walking through the adoption pages. Of course, never with a conscious thought that I was getting another dog--just curiosity to see what was out there. Well, you already know the rest of the story. I found a gorgeous Golden/Lab mix in exactly the 1 yr old age span we wanted as a family. Perhaps we could make ourselves ready for the right dog--or so I thought.
When she arrived from South Carolina, I began to realize that the only accurate part of the advertisement was her color. A Vet check revealed that she was really 3-4 years old, already had a litter of pups (but was spayed!), and had real disease issues (heart worms, lyme disease, major tooth decay). All of these medical problems on top of the behavioral issues; she had real triggers for fear. In fact, when other family members wanted to meet her, they had to search under tables to find her.
Of course, I told the agency that we'd have to return her. That was fine with them. However, they had just found a vet who could do the heart worm treatment pro bono. Could I possibly take her to the Vet and leave her for a few days? Of course.
Meanwhile, I worked on the fear issues using Caesar Millan's dog whisperer series--they're great! Foremost treat the frightened animal as a dog. Get her back into her skin as a dog with long walks. Make her walk next to you to establish the relationship. So we walked and walked our feet and paws off. Slowly out of the frightened animal came a dog bonded with me. From that point on, I had the trust to begin working with her.
So at the end of the trial period, I told the agency that "Jezebel" is now home. (Our first two labs came with their names--Annabelle and Isabel.) Oh, she has medical issues to be taken care of. We have more miles to walk for training. But somewhere in this process, I recognized the dog I wanted out of the dog I had expected. To form a working relationship, a bond of trust to walk off our years together. You're home girl....
When I think back on the lives I have listened to over the years, I hear the same pain in my own life over expectations that did not work out. Life arrived in packages not ordered. I like to remind my children that if I had had my way in my early years, well then, they would not even be here!
TS Eliot put it this way in my favorite play, The Family Reunion: "Why I have this calling, I will never know. And it must have been preparing always. Now I see that it is exactly what I want. I must follow the bright angels."
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